Being a working mum won't doom your kids, so let go of your guilt

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Being a working mum won't doom your kids, so let go of your guilt
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Science points out that there are advantages to children whose mothers work, so society should help support mothers.

Whether she is one who works in the office or runs her small business from home, a mother should be supported and released from mum's guilt. — 123rf.com

The prejudice against working mothers assumes that if there is insufficient attention on children, the kids’ future won’t be as good as those who have stay-at-home mums.According to psychologist Dr Sarah Kopelovich from the University of Washington, there is no strong evidence to show that children with working mothers are worse off than those with stay-at-home mothers. She noted that research evidence points to generally good outcomes instead.

From psychological research, we know that emotions are functional – even the unpleasant ones. They can help us understand ourselves better. Identifying and naming the emotion is powerful. Naming guilty feelings as ‘guilt’ gives you the opportunity to work on it by thinking: “What is the guilt trying to tell me?” and “What can I do about it?”

There is only so much resource you have at any one time. Some things have got to give. Even when there is success, achievements on one side of life can also mean failures in other parts of it. Referring to self-help resources and seeking professional help can also provide ideas in addressing guilt. Some companies provide employee assistance programmes where staff can access outsourced and confidential psychological counselling services for free. Such services can be helpful in reducing the perceived social pressure of being a working mother.What we don’t hear about when we talk about work-life balance is the amount of distress we need to cope with when setting up boundaries.

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